{"quotes":[{"text":"I blame Mother Nature two-faced bitch and Father Time bloody bastard .Yep those misogynistic killjoys have cut off my pocket money and left me grounded.With  those two authoritarian heavyweights ganging up what chance does a woman have I aks you.","author":"Kathy Lette","tags":["beauty","nature","nip","nip-and-tucp","nip-tuck","tuck"],"id":74793,"author_id":"Kathy+Lette"},{"text":"Tuck a buck as a puck of luck.","author":"Toba Beta","tags":["buck-puck","luck","tuck"],"id":85123,"author_id":"Toba+Beta"},{"text":"He laughs. 'Put some clothes on so you don't scare poor Kiara with your morning hard-on.'I look down at my shorts. Sure enough, I've got la tengo dura in front of Kiara and Tuck. Shit. I reach out for the first thing I can grab and put it in front of me to shield myself from view. It happens to be one of Kiara's stuffed animals, but I don't have much choice right now.'That's Kiara's Mojo,' Tuck says, laughing. 'Get it? Mojo?","author":"Simone Elkeles","tags":["carlos","carlos-fuentes","funny","kiara","kiara-westford","perfect-chemistry","rules-of-attraction","simone-elkeles","tuck"],"id":257983,"author_id":"Simone+Elkeles"},{"text":"Well if manners maketh man make-up maketh woman.And we don't need a phalanx of behavioural scientists to explain why man judge women by their looks.Because the see bether than thay think.","author":"Kathy Lette","tags":["humor","man","nip-and-tuck","tip","tip-tuck","tuck","woman"],"id":277131,"author_id":"Kathy+Lette"},{"text":"Okay, seriously, I dont know if this is true or not, but I heard people who use profanity are trying to compensate for their lack of you know... Size' -Tuck.","author":"Simone Elkeles","tags":["carlos","humor","tuck"],"id":390404,"author_id":"Simone+Elkeles"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":5,"pages":1}}