{"quotes":[{"text":"A celebrity farts, and everyone endures, but the unpopular will be thrased to death.","author":"Michael Bassey Johnson","tags":["admiration","admire","crowd","endurance","fart","farting","favour","favouritism","funny","humor","humour","michael-bassey-johnson","poverty","unpopularity"],"id":152,"author_id":"Michael+Bassey+Johnson"},{"text":"There's a place for farts, and there's a place for sharts.","author":"J.E. Haldeman","tags":["fart","humorous"],"id":12753,"author_id":"J.E.+Haldeman"},{"text":"Pity, I've learned, is like a fart. You can tolerate your own, but you simply can't stand anyone else's.","author":"Jonathan Tropper","tags":["fart","funny","humour","joke","pity","sad","sadness"],"id":79094,"author_id":"Jonathan+Tropper"},{"text":"Home is where the heart is, home is where the fart is.Come let us fart in the home.There is no art in a fart.Still a fart may not be artless.Let us fart and artless fart in the home.","author":"Ernest Hemingway","tags":["art","fart","farting","home"],"id":95029,"author_id":"Ernest+Hemingway"},{"text":"What happened next… well, I'm going to blame it on the fact that I was scared. And I had just flown or fallen or something through about eighty years worth of Time. Or maybe it was the beans. I farted. I farted loud enough that it echoed around the small closet, bounced off all four walls and finally escaped through the open door. At least that's what it did in my mind's eye.","author":"Dinah Katt","tags":["fart","rebel","time-travel"],"id":125942,"author_id":"Dinah+Katt"},{"text":"I want to do it too!” said Gazzy, sitting very, very quietly, completely motionless.“Nope,” said Nudge, shaking her head. “You stand out like a fart in church.","author":"James Patterson","tags":["church","fart","funny","lol","powers"],"id":160573,"author_id":"James+Patterson"},{"text":"An employer’s fart is music to his employees’ ears.","author":"Mokokoma Mokhonoana","tags":["ears","employee","employer","employment","fart","music"],"id":220771,"author_id":"Mokokoma+Mokhonoana"},{"text":"Wait!' said Erbrechen, suddenly feeling jovial. 'I change my mind. Never shite again. Ever. Anywhere.'It was a small thing, but of such small things were life's joys truly made. The thought, he knew, would keep him smiling for days.'The world is a comedy, intoned Erbrechen, tittering, 'and each must play his fart.","author":"Michael R. Fletcher","tags":["delusion","fart","irony","mad","mind-control"],"id":245063,"author_id":"Michael+R.+Fletcher"},{"text":"Most people would rather eat inside a windowless room in which they have just defecated than eat inside one in which someone else has just farted, even if the room does not have a toilet.","author":"Mokokoma Mokhonoana","tags":["aphorism","aphorisms","aphorist","aphorists","comfort-station","defecate","defecation","faeces","fart","farted","farts","feces","funny","hilarious","humor","humorous","humour","joke","jokes","lavatory","loo","narcissism","powder-room","restroom","satire","shit","toilet","toilets","urinal","vanity","washroom"],"id":265038,"author_id":"Mokokoma+Mokhonoana"},{"text":"I swear by the self-assurance with which elderly men sitting in public tilt sideways to allow the gas to escape loudly.","author":"Pawan Mishra","tags":["fart","flatulence","funny","humorous","self-assurance","swearing"],"id":331521,"author_id":"Pawan+Mishra"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":14,"pages":2,"next":"?page=2\u0026page_size=10"}}