{"quotes":[{"text":"Honey, are you being safe?''I wear my seat belt, yes.''Does this Rob Lovely wear a seat belt too?'Matty sighed. 'Mother, seat belts should be worn at all times when in a moving vehicle. Didn't you teach me that?''So long as we're both talking about condoms here, then I'll leave it.''Consider it left.","author":"Leta Blake","tags":["awkward-moments","hilarious","mm"],"id":2041,"author_id":"Leta+Blake"},{"text":"Quiet descended, a silence so consuming that even the drafty corridors ceased whistling. Bog wasn't certain where to look, so he solved the problem by plucking out his eyes and sticking them in a drawer.","author":"A. Lee Martinez","tags":["awkward-moments","eyes","ned","ogres"],"id":25300,"author_id":"A.+Lee+Martinez"},{"text":"You’d think that silence would be peaceful. But really, it’s painful.","author":"David Levithan","tags":["awkward-moments","silence"],"id":56545,"author_id":"David+Levithan"},{"text":"Sometimes the silence is the loudest thing in the room.","author":"Cory Basil","tags":["awkward","awkward-moments","loneliness","silence","volume"],"id":87734,"author_id":"Cory+Basil"},{"text":"It's only awkward if it matters.","author":"Joyce Rachelle","tags":["awkward","awkward moments","awkwardness","relationships","the past","things-that-matter"],"id":243783,"author_id":"Joyce+Rachelle"},{"text":"Because daytime leaves vampires less than, well, conscious, I told him, “Take your muffins to Boston and shut it, Terrance.” And then I hung up on him.","author":"Molly Harper","tags":["awkward-moments","awkwardness","fantasy-romance","funny","hilarious","humor","humour","jane-jamison","molly-harper","paranormal","paranormal-romance","paranormal-series","phone-calls","pnr","sleep-talking","telephone","vampire","vampire-romance","vampires","vampirism"],"id":322012,"author_id":"Molly+Harper"},{"text":"If you want to call it quits, just tell me. Man up and say it to my face. Don’t just skulk around.","author":"J.M. Richards","tags":["anna-and-chad","awkward","awkward-moments","breakup","breakup","breakups","call-it-quites","fights","j-m-richards","jerk-boyfriend","jerks","man-up","tall-dark-streak-of-lighting","tdsol"],"id":333676,"author_id":"J.M.+Richards"},{"text":"Dear God, he prayed irreverently, was her blouse even legal?","author":"Sheri Webber","tags":["attraction","awkward-moments","harrassment","men","women"],"id":335674,"author_id":"Sheri+Webber"}],"pagination":{"page":1,"page_size":10,"total":8,"pages":1}}